Tag: Change

Paddling

Bringing Dad to Baja

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Some of my earliest memories are fuzzy yet profound…me waking in the morning and “getting to see dad”, post trip. We (my sister and I who were inseparable) couldn’t bug him before he woke, and he’d been gone for some amount of time (I was younger than 5 years so time was mostly irrelevant–it seemed “long”). But the first morning was always magical because that’s when we’d receive the “loot” from his travels. I remember a beautiful fan from Japan adorned with a painting of Mt Fuji and a coveted cloth doll from the Carribean–black fabric with a bright head scarf and huge gold hoop earrings. SO exotic, especially for me and my sister who never got presents except for birthday and holidays (this isn’t a “we walked ten miles in the snow both ways” comment…that’s just how things were). And after we got our gifts he would share stories. Fascinating and other-worldly, since again, we grew up differently. We DIDN’T travel all over as a family like so many kids I see these days. It was a quaint little life in unnoteworthy Salem Oregon. Big trips consisted of many visits to our family in Puget Sound area, or out to the Oregon coast (which is awesome).

But this. This was stuff out of the movies. Volcanoes and deep-sea diving, dancing and music, jungles and experiences that only someone like my dad–capable, adventurous, and a splash of rule-bending–could recount. *Note here, when I say rule-bending I mean ignoring signs like “Do not go beyond this sign” or “Danger”, not law-breaking. He was specifically moral in that sense.

It was exhilarating and it’s because of these memories of such tales, that both my sister and I have an inner wanderlust that is so fundamental to our being. Over time, I’ve realized I travel for NEW experiences. I’ll return to a location almost never, unless it’s for work. Or in this circumstance, to bring dad back.

My dad passed away with Alzheimer’s about four years ago. He battled it for quite a while–11 years which is far longer than average. The most heart-wrenching aspect of this horrible disease is that it steals the very essence of who the victim is. My mom says dad “faded away” which is true, and a very benign description of what actually happened. We didn’t have a memorial for dad and we blame Covid, but the truth is that none of us could really grasp it. My sister and I vowed to bring his ashes with us on travels but it wasn’t until now that we were/are ready. And we are. In a fun way, which is what dad would have wanted. I have a small, non-script jar and one of my favorite photos of my dad. We bring him with us unceremoniously in my back pack (I have it sitting next to me on the table as I write). We’ve shed no tears. In fact, I say “common dad, we’re going for a hike”. Again, this is how dad would have wanted things.

Beth and I chose this trip to begin memorializing him, because my dad came here for years to dive and fish with a group of close friends who called themselves the “Brothers of the Baja”. Now looking back as a 40+ human myself, I realize he was young and in the prime of his life…which lends toward some of the stories we heard (not the least of which involving tequila and why he never drank it again even before he quit drinking altogether) **. I recall him describing marlin fishing…also when he quit fishing altogether. Dad told us that they were observing the gorgeous marlin–stunning in color, up until the moment it was fished and died at which time it turned gray. That was the last time he ever fished.

This is my second trip to Baja and in the time spent here I have seen marine life to rival no other. Having lived in Maui for three years when it was still pretty undeveloped, I’ve seen some really cool stuff…beautiful sea creatures! But here in Baja, I have swam, snorkeled and sup’ed seeing sooo many amazing things just out the back door (literally–it’s about 30 steps down to the water). It’s really quite mind-blowing!! I can only imagine back then it was even more prolific.

So with all that said, we made the decision for this to be the first of many trips to take dad. We’ve already found a couple great places to free his ashes and there will be more. Welcome back dad. Welcome back.

**Dad quit drinking alcohol entirely when I was in my teens with one glaring exception. He was hiking in the jungles of Borneo the year after it reopened to American citizens. They hiked into a location inhabited by a tribe who believed that my dad and his traveling buddy Sam, were semi-deities. They hosted a dinner for the two of them and offered a ceremonial drink to them, in honor of the “friendship”. He clearly didn’t refuse.

Paddling · Self-Actualization · Wellness

New Rivers, Old Faces…Old Rivers, New Faces

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This summer was pretty dang cool and as usual, when I’ve got the most to write about I’m too busy so I’ll hit some highlights…

A visit to “Zoo-town”!! It had been waaaay too long since I’d visited Missoula and some of the most important people in my world, having lived there for almost a decade. It was with a ridiculous amount of luggage that I flew into the now remodeled airport to get entirely laughed at by my BFF Deirdre. She wasn’t wrong…it was pretty silly how much I brought, considering the relatively short duration of my visit, however I had to bring my Atcha SUP so I could paddle the Blackfoot. And my bike stuff. And “go out to eat/drinks” clothes. And hiking clothes. And hanging out comfy clothes. Honestly, I ended up doing (and needing clothes/gear) for ALL of those things. We packed a lot into a relatively short time. It was great to see old stomping grounds and catch up with friends.

During this visit I said so many times “I don’t remember Montana being so beautiful”! It truly is, and I’ll be visiting more in the coming years. This visit, I stayed with Deirdre which worked great considering her location in the University district. Per the usual, Deirdre’s schedule was pretty full, but she was able to set aside blocks of time for us . When she had appointments, I was able to venture out to meet with other old friends. About the time when Deirdre got really really busy, Andre had finished up with his trial, and was able to dedicate some paddling, biking and hang out time (Andre is my ex of 8+ years and longtime friend ever since). We paddled the Blackfoot where I was able to finally confront Thibedeaux “falls” (it’s not really a falls but a class III rapid which had been my nemesis way back in the day when I was largely clueless to rivers and was beginning to learn whitewater kayaking…which did NOT go well. This time, I cleaned Thibedeaux on my SUP, and Andre and I shared a big “yeeehaw”, knowing what it meant to me. After the paddle, we met Deirdre for dinner and the two of them proceeded to tease me to death (like old times) which I absolutely adored. It felt like “home” regardless of how we’ve all changed and grown (I specifically leave out the word “mature” here). Ha! Andre has a lovely partner and daughter, and a thriving practice he opened. Deirdre is in high demand professionally and personally and owns a lovely three-story house, truck and camper–quite a leap from when she and I rented a few blocks from each other in humble dwellings (hers small enough so you couldn’t actually close the bathroom door all the way). The three of us have all suffered traumas, and also had huge wins, and the mutual love remains to this day. I can’t tell you how awesome that feels. Like coming home to a place where people who are chosen family accept and support me unconditionally.

The whole trip was surreal, to be in a place I’d lived, to the point of monotony, but to revisit with so much “new” to experience. Missoula is gorgeous with much vibrance and opportunity. Really enjoyed my time.

California Dreamin…. About two weeks after my trip to Missoula, I left for the South Fork of the American river to paddle with Davide Sartoni (River SUP Guy). I’d asked my sis to join me, and we planned to drive the 9-ish hours over three days. That was a leisurely and fantastic approach, exploring whatever caught our interest, spending the first night in Ashland. Our cute little Airbnb was perfectly located, just blocks from the historic downtown. We tootled around, had a nice dinner next to the creek and walked up through Lithia Park. The next morning, post balcony yoga session and an extra cup of coffee we continued south, with the majority of our day spent in Dunsmuir. Here we did two hikes. The first up Castle Crag where we viewed three separate formations of entirely different geologic eras, the most recent, Mount Shasta. It was an amazing view, and a fun (hot) hike so we were ready for our second riverside hike, where I introduced my sister to the “cold plunge”. Skeptical at first, she embraced the idea, and I think I might have another convert!! The plunge definitely helped cool and re-energize the both of us and were very ready for an earned cheeseburger and beer at Dunsmuir Brewery. Thoroughly exhausted and well-fed, we drove the 90 minutes to Red Bluff which dropped us out of the beautiful Shasta-Trinity National forest into the dry, rolling-hills landscape speckled with oak trees–very California-esque.

The next day was the final drive to our destination of Placerville, just outside of Coloma where I’d be meeting up with Davide. On the way we had a very spontaneous and delightful stop in old-town Sacramento. It’s over-the-top touristy but in the best way. Enjoyed drinks at Finnegans Irish bar making friends with the bartender who gave us some local beta, shot a round at the skeet shooting booth and got a sugar high simply walking into the huge Old-Fashioned Candy shop. But onward!!

I’m SO glad we chose Placerville which we both adored. This cute little town, the location where gold was first discovered in the California Gold Rush, has a historic district with boutiques, random shops, the oldest hardware store in the US and awesome restaurants. I won’t gush with details about our time there, but there is plenty to rave about. I was also really ready and excited to get on the river!!

The first day on the South Fork of the American was just Davide and me. Such a great day! Fun river, friendly rapids and an opportunity to paddle something new. The second day I ran sweep for his whitewater SUP class. I always learn a ton when seeing others instruct, and I’m really impressed with Davide. He’s an awesome paddler, teacher and all-round great guy. I’ll be hitting him up to do some other trips in the future for sure. Soca 2025? A gooooood possibility. He also leads SUP trips on the Pacuare in Costa Rica, Tara river in Montenegro and the Rogue.

I chose to stay local in August because I knew I’d be leaving for much of September and October. I wanted to paddle the McKenzie and Santiam rivers which I truly love. I had a chance to paddle with old friends, and also make new ones, hitting both locations multiple times over the last couple months. Regardless of who I’m paddling with, I never seem to tire of these two beautiful stretches. Now the fall is winding down and the snow is starting to fly which means I’ll paddle way less and focus on winter play, but I’ll still sneak a paddle in when I can.

SUP on Tahoe… Ok, it’s not a river, but I had such a great time with this crew of people it book-ended my water travel for the summer well. My mentor Steve Scherrer and I flew out to Tahoe, via Reno to certify a group of employees and volunteers with Achieve Tahoe (an organization similar to Oregon’s OAS). Achieve works with adaptive folks all seasons of the year but has a strong presence on the lake…kinda for obvious reasons. Tahoe is beautiful and accessible, and it had been decades since I’d been there so I was excited to see the lake and meet these incredible people. They didn’t disappoint.

Because this was an ACA certification course, we were homestay’ed at one of the volunteer’s homes just 4 minutes from Alpine Meadows–gorgeous. The couple that hosted us were super people (and both gourmet cooks/bakers which didn’t suck either…home-baked sourdough bread and macaroons as two glaring examples!!!). They really went above and beyond to make our visit awesome. We were out of the house every morning by 7:30am to be at our meeting spot by 8am with at least a couple of the Achieve team already setting up. Because their group had worked together for years they had an existing dynamic, based in compassion, support and strong communication skills. They’re all teachers themselves so they “got it”. I’ve never worked in a cert course, with a group of people like them. Really fun–energetic and engaged. Tuning up their SUP skills was simple too as they were athletes. I look forward to going back this spring when they do their next cert.

So that wraps up a few of the summer highlights. What jumps out when writing this post is the profound impact people have on our experiences. From all different walks of life, views, and backgrounds. I had a lot of really fun adventures…admittedly an incredible summer. I’m so fortunate! Yet it’s the people that stand out when I think back. In this time of what I can only think of as “separation” I hope that people can put aside the negativity and look toward what is similar in us, and not what our differences are.

Thanks for listening…see ya out there on the frisky ripples!!

Paddling · Self-Actualization · Wellness

When Things Go Wrong

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In case you missed this in the blog description, I write mostly about finding stoke doing those things that excite and inspire, at a level that challenges YOU! Not your Olympian friend or pro-athlete down the street (a common occurrence if you live in Bend). I love rivers, mountains and wilderness in general. Nature calls to me, and if I’m not out in it for even a few minutes daily, things start to go a little wonky in my head. I might not be paddling Class V rapids or heli-skiing but any time we venture out, there is a chance for things to go sideways. I’ve had my share of crashes and splashes resulting in injuries and wounds to varying degrees. This is why I found myself recertifying my Wilderness First Aid and CPR over the last few weeks, for the jillionth time. That, and I guide/coach people weekly who I might need to help should something go wrong (and it’s been my experience it’s a “when” rather than “if” situation).

First Aid/CPR certification courses are great to bring top-of-mind awareness and it’s easily forgotten after a few months, let alone years. They can be booooooring in your typical classroom with “textbook” lectures and splint-setting. What I did last month was distinctly different, working with a guy who had trained our team a couple times over the last decade. It was his approach that I remembered when considering who to train our TC staff and myself this year. Serious, funny, wicked-smart and practical.

Because I needed to expedite my recertification for other certifications not to lapse, I chose the unique opportunity to work one-on-one with this guy–an expert in his field. Not someone trained to train (although he is), but someone who is in the field himself witnessing and leading all sorts of rescue and trauma-relief situations. Someone who cuts through the bullshit and does what is most effective in real-life events, like addressing a massive hemorrhage before airway, as taught in our ABC’s because the major blood-loss would result in no oxygen anyway. Yikes-major stuff! Sidenote, if the term ABC’s is completely foreign to you, consider a first aid course. You never know when walking down the street you’ll confront an emergency. I have been the first responder to more than a couple “randoms” in my life and it was nice to feel at least, partly capable!

Back in “the warehouse” (the base camp for his team that ends up deploying all over the world, and headquarters for instruction) I had the opportunity to relearn first aid skills in a unique way. Most poignant, a femoral wound that I needed to pack with veeeeeery realistic fake, warm, viscous “blood” spurting…yes, spurting. Holy cats! Not the online learning we get through various other programs. I feel fortunate to have had this experience and will be going back to work on more realistic scenarios.

Not all that goes wrong in life is so “bloody” or dramatic. In prior posts I’ve talked about life changes and schedule changes and reservation misses. Most recently a friend ventured on a solo trip. Logistics were considered, hotel booked, and Uber app updated. Except the Uber app didn’t work. I’ve had this happen to me too, whether a bad connection or…who knows? She chose to walk herself and her luggage about 1.5 miles (uphill through a questionable neighborhood) to her hotel. She arrived tired and exhausted… but got there. Something to complain about? Perhaps, but instead she gained confidence and felt empowered by proving to herself she could do it. In fact, all of the small “mistakes” along the way were met with logic and considered an opportunity to remember her capabilities. I’d dare say the challenges that were overcome made her trip!

For myself, this last year I’ve rediscovered singlehood and been reminded how resilient we are as autonomous beings. I’ve found after a life of being with a partner and then without, that my brain “switches”, knowing I’ve got just myself to depend on. From travel to personal emergencies to household tasks, I know I have myself and I can typically handle it–and I take full responsibility. Most times, I rise to the occasion quite well (and if I “miss” there’s no one there to point it out! Ha!)

Things can certainly go wrong. Always, my heart goes out to those people experiencing natural disasters/warfare that cause utter destruction and loss. For our more mundane challenges I suggest looking at the opportunities you might find in the experience–the silver linings. As I’ve said before, we’re all between swims. Crawl back on your board, or into your boat, reset and paddle on (literally or figuratively).

Thanks for listening…see ya out there on the frisky ripples!

Paddling · Self-Actualization · Wellness

Why Worry?

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I don’t spend a lot of time in “if onlys” or “what ifs”. Life unfolds the way it should, based on a million different decisions, actions and behaviors. This has been a roller-coaster decade for me personally, full of SO many incredibly wonderful experiences. And some pretty shitty ones. I’m not alone…everyone has their share of suck. I’ve watched family and friends battle disease (some overcoming it and some not) and tragic accidents that have upended families, impacting them with the worst outcomes. It’s cliche but what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger…and hopefully more positive. There have been thousands of books written on positivity, moving cheese?! (haha…change) and living life in the present. Here’s just one more blog if you didn’t get enough!

My sis and I have been focusing a lot on change and how to intentionally craft the life you want. We began communicating about it almost daily, over a year ago when she was diagnosed with cancer for the second time. Literally the very next day she set about making change and DOING. Doing the things that made her happy and fulfilled. She also was extremely helpful and generous with her time…most notably to my mom who was going through, as it turned out, a life-threatening condition resulting in major surgery and a lengthy recovery. The tenacity with which my sister has stuck to her “new life” is quite inspiring. I treasure our daily emails and texts, supporting each other and looking forward to many many exciting changes.

Additionally, we’ve been talking about “mindfulness”. There are a lot of different practitioners that use buzz phrases..Power of Now, Radical Acceptance, How to not give a F&$k (a more “hip” and sexier branding)…it’s all essentially the same thing we’ve been studying for years. The concept is extraordinarily simple, yet very very difficult to do. It’s this…put down your damn devices, stop multi-tasking, get out of your head and BE with wherever you are. Use your senses (touch, taste, smell, sound, and sight) to perceive the moment. Talk WITH the person you’re communicating with (not thinking about a million other things while doing it). And for God sake…and this is a big one…stop worrying. Have you ever considered what worrying does for you? Not a damn thing. Not ONE DAMN THING. Except stress you out, make you anxious, mess with your sleep, and annoy the crap out of your friends and family talking endlessly about negativity and fear. 

Let’s be clear…that doesn’t mean hard things don’t happen. It’s just how we move through the events. Everyone deals with trauma differently–some let it define them, place blame or act harshly to the world around them (no finger pointing or judgement). Others, move through, feeling the “feels” but doing okay, and yet others acknowledge, accept and perhaps even internalize the event as a learning opportunity for personal growth and compassion. But one thing is a truth…worrying won’t change or affect anything.

As the glittery lights and holiday parties wind down this year, and we’re left with the gray winter (and apparently no snow here in central Oregon anyway…oiy!) maybe consider picking up one of these books about mindfulness–or listening to a podcast if that’s your jam. You have nothing to lose! …except maybe a whole lot of worrying!

Thanks for listening! See ya out there on the frisky ripples….

Paddling · Self-Actualization · Wellness

Change of Season

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Around Oregon, the shift from summer this year, was almost immediate–like a flick of the switch, with basically no fall, straight into winter. The sunny days in a tank top, pulling weeds and raking leaves at the homestead went quickly into Willamette Valley weather…rain and wind. Let’s be clear…I’m not complaining (Yet. I am not a fan of WV winters of endless rain). Right now, however, with a fire crackling making it toasty warm, having just finished a lunch of hot soup, I feel so cozy there should be a Hallmark Movie logo stamped on my…mmmmm…forehead. Bring on the rain!

Am I going to spend every day lounging around the house? Naaah. That’s not my style. I’ve been known to run wearing ski goggles and full rain gear when we’re getting torrential downpour, on iced-over, heavily tracked, uneven snow pack. Not badass, just motivated...and maybe a little crazy. Sitting still for too long is not my strong suit.

This year has been a metaphorical “change of seasons” for me too. Pre-Covid, I’d typically be traveling somewhere for several weeks in the fall, enjoying a break after a busy summer– going paddling, biking, hiking, whether in Bend or on the road. Later, after the holidays I’d head somewhere south where it’s warmer, either leading a retreat or having fun for myself (“research” for the next potential location!). However, as I evolve my living and working situations, I’ve found a lot of pleasure in flexing my “domestic muscles” and expanding my little wellness-facilitating biz. Seems the perfect time to do it eh? Because everywhere I look it appears people are shaking things up in their lives. The pandemic had some horrible consequences for many. It dislodged the status quo for people with all kinds of outcomes. Break-ups, pregnancies, people leaving long-time jobs, starting different careers, or taking a new outlook on their health. Whatever the case, it’s definitely a time of transitions.

Change is really hard for many… I’d say most even. What seems to hold true from my point of view, is that you are in control of the change if you are proactive in it. When change “happens” to you, it’s quite the opposite. Like rapids on a river, if you are faster than the current, you are in control of your craft, but if the current is faster than you, it’s in control. One significant example is the aging population. Some choose to take control of their health and living situation, maximizing the chances of enjoying a relatively active and independent lifestyle. It can involve some tough decisions and/or discipline, but with a “can do” mindset, the outcome is seemingly positive. Others fight (or ignore) the realities of aging, and it doesn’t always go well, for themselves or their loved ones. I’ve worked with seniors over half my life and witnessed friends and family-members’ various approaches to this inevitable part of life. I can only hope I am reasonable in my decision-making when it comes time, but I have some great role models to learn from!!

My sister’s “Outlaws”…a term we lovingly say based on her 20-year relationship, have been incredibly logical about their golden years. The plan had been set, down payment made, and finally executed to move into an amazing retirement village several months ago. They researched and compared many options, and the community they ultimately chose is RAD! From libraries to craft centers, incredible restaurants and overall approach, this retirement village is very forward-thinking. I believe their motto is something like “let us help you take care of yourself”. I prescribe to that concept.

Another example…and I know he will read this…is a gentleman I’ve been fitness coaching for about 10 months and paddleboard-instructing for years. He is regimented about his personal wellness (exercise, diet and health care). Like many aging bodies, he’s had knee surgery and has hip issues. Won’t we all? Best to mitigate some of the pain and inevitable decline we’ll each experience, yes? I give him props for being so determined. One might even say tenacious, and I say, “Way to go”!

This all gives me food for thought. How can I set myself up for personal success and fulfilment over time? I can’t give you my full answer today, but what I can say is that I’m going to stay active, do those things that feed my soul and make course-corrections as necessary. Thanks for listening…hope to see you out there on the frisky ripples…of life.

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